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WANT TO HAVE AN IMPACT? BRUSH UP ON YOUR INFLUENCE SKILLS Join this Ivy Sea cyber-dialogue on influence by sharing your ideas at the Blue Participation Points throughout the article, and we'll include all constructive feedback in a future piece on influence. (For an idea of what's not constructive, read this month's piece on Civility.) The Two Faces of Influence Influence the word is packed with different meanings, and sets off emotional responses across the spectrum. Webster's II New Riverside Dictionary offers up this definition: influence (n.) 1. The power to produce effects, esp. indirectly or through an intermediary. Of course, we know that the dictionary is only a starting place for the meaning of a word. Our experience and perceptions give more color to the fuller meaning we give language. Here are a few ways to think about influence:
A Matter of Multiple Perspectives Perspective One: The thought of being influential is reviled, associated with manipulation, money, hierarchical power, cultural position, misused authority, abused trust or worse. For example, an unethical loan shark can be considered influential, but here, the word might be a euphemism for bullying people and cracking skulls. History gives us no shortage of other examples of influence at its worst. Perspective Two: Here, we see another definition of influence: traits that make some people effective in their dealings with others due to how they interact with people and compel them to take action. Here, influence means well-developed interpersonal communication skill and a genuine (and demonstrated) desire to be of service. This is the sort of influence most people aspire to refine and master, including those of us here at IVC. Participation Point:
Take That HEPA Filter Off Your Perception If you want to begin cultivating a more influential manner, youve got to shed your negative perceptions about influence, open your thinking to accept new ideas, and learn techniques to allow you to be positively influential. If you think influence is a negative thing, take a moment to walk through this exercise: (1) Think of one person whom you respect or find charismatic. It can be anyone a friend, a mentor, or a sports or comic book hero. (2) Has knowing this person (or simply knowing his or her actions) persuaded you to act in some way or change your behavior or mind-set? Well, thats positive influence. Do you see any negative association with the affect this person had on you? By moving beyond our filters or negative definitions of influence, we can see how such behavior can benefit ourselves and others, and learn how to become more influential in a positive way. Participation Point:
What Traits Are Considered Influential? Researchers have discovered certain qualities that all influential people embody. Key traits seem to fall into three primary categories: First and foremost, influential people are driven to be influential from within. They seem positive and confident, demonstrate excellence, are action-oriented and have a sense of humor. These elements manifest themselves outwardly as:
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Influential people are good communicators on a person-to-person level. They are:
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Positively influential people are other-focused leaders, meaning they are not completely self-absorbed. They're people others want to model and/or follow. For example, they:
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Becoming influential is more than reading a couple of articles and intellectualizing the concept. It takes hard work and plenty of real-life trials to build influential traits. Your work is never done, but moments of skillfulness are a reward in and of themselves. To learn more about influence and how to become more influential in a positive way, examine traits of people you find influential, review history to get to know influential people and why they were influential, and visit your local bookseller for related books. And most of all, put theory into action and practice, practice, practice. Participation Point: For more influence-related resources: Ladder of Inference: How your perceptual filters affect your ability to be influential To be a great communicator, learn to be a great listener Refine your interpersonal communication skill Leadership communication tips Learn a few interpersonal tips from the art of Dialogue For more information on approaches to more effective communication Ivy Sea's IntraPersonal and Mindset Mastery CyberWorkshop Ivy Sea's Organizational Communication CyberWorkshop or e-mail us at info@ivysea.com. Remember, this information provides food-for-thought. Your needs are unique, so the most effective leadership, or organizational or interpersonal communication plans are those that have been customized to meet your unique needs and those of your organization. |
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